Too Fast

Another week and another weekend just went by way too fast.

T had her dance showcase Thursday night and everyone did a GREAT job! I can not believe how fast this year has flown by! She only has a few short days left of her junior year. Today we had a tea for the senior girls and had a nice time. Lots of good food and the punch was delicious! T asked me to get the recipe from the mom who made it (alas, still no tea served at today's tea. Just don't get that). You can just tell the senior girls are so ready to go. A couple of them were talking about sororities and I just don't see Tbone joining a sorority. She's such an non-conformist and doesn't really need affirmation from others. She's her own person and I totally love that about her.

A year or two ago a friend gave me a GREAT book to read about campus greek life. Fraternities and sororities are a whole new world to me. Up North, it's really not a big deal. As a matter of fact, I don't think any of my high school girl friends joined sororities and most of the guys I knew in fraternities were absolute A-holes. The book was a real eye-opener for me and I think it is a must read for any parent about to send their child off to college. Unfortunately, I think a lot of parents (particularly those mom's who are living superficially thru their daughters) will miss the point of the book entirely. As with most things in life, there are two side to each story and I think it's important for every child to have enough information to make good solid decisions they are comfortable with.

While I've heard some wonderful things about greek life (the life-long bonds/friendship, etc.), I've also heard some horror stories and do know a few girls who ending up leaving sororities because it interfered with their course load too much. I'm not knocking sororities but I do find it interesting that the majority of the book reviewers (most of who are sorority sisters themselvs) do not disagree that these things happen in a sorority:

"After all, everyone knows sororities can be exclusive, conformist, and superficial organizations. Following four sorority sisters through their first year in the house, a world of sex, drugs, eating disorders, and insecurity is revealed as well as the extreme pressure brought to bear on these young women to repress their own natural instincts, desires, and inclinations in order to fit in with an amazingly shallow and often unworthy group of friends. Where the author really scores is in her analysis of why otherwise intelligent and sensitive women would sacrifice their independence, and often self-respect, for the sake of an artificially engineered secret society."

"I am not blind enough to sit here and say " I have NEVER seen any of these things described in the book. That is simply not true. The alcohol, the parties, the date rape, the eating disorders- it's all there. Maybe it wasn't a part of my sorority, or yours, but it's been a part of someone's. Every chapter, on every campus, is different. One of my sorority's chapters at a major university was closed due to hazing. Yet, I was never once hazed in any way. It all depends where you are and the people who are there with you.

I didn't read this book thinking that the author was exposing "sororities everywhere." But I do think she provides a good depiction of how MANY sorority chapters operate. I think she also remained very objective in her writing. And, just think back to junior high or high school- the same catty girls, pressure to conform, etc. It's not all that different."

"I am a currently graduating member of a sorority at a large campus. I read this book out of curiosity, but I came out feeling like I'd just seen my life in the mirror. "Dress Checks",binge drinking, and "selling the sorority" were what I endured for several years. While I did not encounter everything in the book, like hazing and drug abuse, I absolutely believe that this book is a fairly accurate representation of what goes on in these societies. Sororities will probably never change, but I hope that sisters will read this book and allow themselves to recognize their own lives in it."

"Being a member of a sorority at a large Midwestern university made me want to read this book and I definitely was not disappointed! I have recommended it to all of my sorority sisters... and anyone else who would like to read it. While I dont think that the main characters of the book are a great protrayal of all sorority sisters, they were still so fun to read about. I felt that the author was fair in her writings but since she was at a Southern university, where sororities are everything, I feel that this book does give a slightly off idea to non-Greeks on what sorority life is like. Not all sororities haze or are as cruel or superficial as some of the girls are in the story. Even though they weren't your everyday sorority, they made for a great book."